Looking for a funny wedding reading? Falling in Love is Like Owning a Dog by Taylor Mali is a great option for your special day…
- "First of all, it’s a big responsibility,
- especially in a city like New York [change as appropriate]
- So think long and hard before deciding on love.
- On the other hand, love gives you a sense of security:
- when you’re walking down the street late at night
- and you have a leash on love
- ain’t no one going to mess with you.
- Because crooks and muggers think love is unpredictable.
- Who knows what love could do in its own defence?
- On cold winter nights, love is warm.
- It lies between you and lives and breathes
- and makes funny noises.
- Love wakes you up all hours of the night with its needs.
- It needs to be fed so it will grow and stay healthy.
- Love doesn’t like being left alone for long.
- But come home and love is always happy to see you.
- It may break a few things accidentally in its passion for life,
- but you can never be mad at love for long.
- Is love good all the time? No! No!
- Love can be bad. Bad, love, bad! Very bad love.
- Love makes messes.
- Love leaves you little surprises here and there.
- Love needs lots of cleaning up after.
- Sometimes you just want to get love fixed.
- Sometimes you want to roll up a piece of newspaper
- and swat love on the nose,
- not so much to cause pain,
- just to let love know Don’t you ever do that again!
- Sometimes love just wants to go for a nice long walk.
- Because love loves exercise.
- It runs you around the block and leaves you panting.
- It pulls you in several different directions at once,
- or winds around and around you
- until you’re all wound up and can’t move.
- But love makes you meet people wherever you go.
- People who have nothing in common but love
- stop and talk to each other on the street.
- Throw things away and love will bring them back,
- again, and again, and again.
- But most of all, love needs love, lots of it.
- And in return, love loves you and never stops."